Where sex be happy happy

Svutlana,

I’m 30 and I’ve been engaged for the past ten months to a woman I dated on and off for about ten years. I am extremely sexually frustrated. Ever since we got engaged, sex has virtually fallen off the map. I get turned down all the time, and she only initiates when she thinks I am mad at her. Even then it seems like it is a chore for her.

I even took her on a tropical vacation recently and I got turned down consistently except for one night. I bring her gifts. I take her on dates. I clean the house. I’m starting to feel like she is not attracted to me — or worse. It’s really making me frustrated and irritable with her. What do I do?

Dear Mr Frustrate,

Thank you too much for question about sex that sudden fall off maps, Mr Frustrate. Unfortunate, Svutlana no be Oracle of Delphuk and can no say exact why fiancée refuse for have sex with you, but it seem for me that this no bode extreme well for life of marry bliss.

Svutlana no be oracle, but see sign that indicate your marry life–no matter how many gift you buy or toilets you clean–will look something like this…

Need you for ask this womens where exact her sex drive be. If she have no sex drive, she need for declare. Suggest me you simple ask fiancée on scale of zero for ten exact where her sex drive be with ten be extreme libidinous and zero be asexual. There be no correct answer for this question.

In Svutlandia, have us annual libido checkup. Just like when go for doctor and he or she tell you where your blood lipids be, every years Svutlandia couple take tests for determine where their libidoes be. Each person be place on bell curve and if there be more than one standard deviation difference in libido, couple immediate go for fuckciliator for libido reconciliation counseling.

It seem for me you and fiancée be at opposite end of libido curve, Mr Frustrate. In Svutlandia, Ministry of Happy Happy would refuse for grant you marry license, but in rest of world Svutlana just say proceed with extreme cautions and good luck for you.

Svutlana

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