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Posts tagged ‘IUD’

Question put Svutlana on spot

Dear Svutlana,

I am a married woman, mid-forties. A few days ago I was drinking chardonnay with a few of my closest friends and we started talking about our G-spots. What are your thoughts on G-spots and G-spot augmentation to achieve bigger orgasms?

Gina & The G-spots

Dear Ms Gina,

Thank you too much for question about G-spot, Atlantis of vagina. Svutlana have absolute no ideas why Svutlana get so many letter about private part procedure like maybe doctor can make big Frankenorgasm if nip here and tuck there or make G-spot in for G-splat.

Do you know what most big sex problem be today, Ms Gina? Guarantee me, it have nothing for do with G-spot. G-spot be private part marketing. Most big sex problem be no want for sex. Augment desire for sex and you be on for something.

But you want for augment Gräfenberg spot, Ms Gina, name after Dr Ernst Gräfenberg who have absolute nothing for do with G-spot. Dr Ernst be ingenious German gynecologist who develop IUD and explore female pleasures of urethra. Ernst Gräfenberg have as much for do with G-spot as Julius Caesar have for do with caesar salad.

Apologize me profuse for Mr Ernst, but Svutlana think better name be God-spot because nobody ever see God and nobody ever see G-spot because it hide inside vagina where nobody can see. Can no see spot with microscope or with MRI machine or even with flashlight like Nancy Drew.

Everybody hope G-spot be in there somewheres and many mens offer for send in penile search parties for try for find, but Svutlana vice for you Ms Gina be no spend time with poke around inside and look for G-spot. Apparent, some womens no have G-spot! Can look and look and look and never find. Apparent, some womens have, but no like for touch. Apparent, some womens have, but no feel anything when touch. In Svutlana opinion, what you think be G-spot be clitoris who get jealous during intercourse and bang on vagina wall with try for get in.

Obvious, G-spot be stupid place for augmentation with inject collagen. And extreme smart. Think about. Doctor inject collagen for spot where think maybe G-spot be. Later you say, “Have me G-spot inject, but orgasm feel exact same!” Go back for doctor and complain. Doctor say, “No my fault! Do me collagen inject. Maybe you who have sex problem…no money back guarantee when inject G-spot!”

At least if have boob job can see result and can complain later if one breast be more big than other or nipple no line up or one nipple point up and one nipple point down. Svutlana think that doctor stick needle inside with big smile because who know if work or not or if G-spot even exist, but sound good and maybe have placebo effect that make womens happy happy. If no work, who care? No hurt anyone but bank account. And like when get botox inject, womens always have for come back for more.

At this points, Svutlana hand over blog for Dr Gräfenberg:

Although female orgasm has been discussed for many centuries or even thousands of years, the problems of female satisfaction are not yet solved…Innumerable erotogenic spots are distributed all over the body, from where sexual satisfaction can be elicited; there are so many that we can almost say that there is no part of the female body which does not give sexual response…”

In other word, Ms Gina, G-spot be everywhere–we only need for augment our consciousness.

Svutlana